 "And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him... And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed."
(Gen 2:18,21-25, KJV)
The book of Proverbs tells us that "He who findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth favour with God." Perhaps, you believe that you have found your "wife (or husband)." How do you know that this is the right woman to be your wife or the right man to be your husband? If you desire marriage, it is good. But do you really know what it is you desire?
We learn from the book of Genesis that marriage is a sacred institution (union) established and ordained by God; hence, marriage is a "spiritual" union. To function in a spiritual union requires one to first function in the spiritual realm. This requires one to have a relationship with God, and of course, one must first be reconciled to God by His grace through the Lord Jesus Christ in order to have a relationship with Him. This can only be accomplished through "spiritual rebirth"...one must be born again (John 3:3). Moreover, to function in a spiritual union requires one to first function in the spiritual realm. This requires one to have a relationship with God...to be born of the Spirit.
In His admonition to the disciples regarding a good foundation in life, Jesus tells us:
"Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.
(Matt 7:24-25, KJV).
This is what Godly, pre-marital counseling is all about...ensuring that you or your loved one start off with the right foundation. As tough as this may sound, the first step is to determine, according to the Word of God, whether or not the person you or your loved one intend to marry is actually the right man or woman that God wills as their husband or wife, respectfully.
When it was time for the Israelites to cross over into the Promise Land, God told Joshua,
"Only be thou strong and very courageous, that thou mayest observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest prosper whithersoever thou goest. This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success"
(Josh 1:7-8, KJV).
If a couple is to prosper and have good success in their marriage, they must, therefore, operate in the will of God according to His Word as found in the Holy Scriptures. And a good first step is to seek out Biblical pre-marital counseling.
Effective, Biblical pre-marital counseling will always address the following points:
- For a couple to prosper in their marriage and have good success, they must first be "born again," that means to be "saved," have Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.
- Both persons should have established an intimate and personal relationship with the person of Jesus Christ
- Both persons should diligently seek God's will through his Word and through fervent prayer
- Know, according to God's Word, the criteria for a Godly woman and a Godly man, respectfully
- Each person should examine themselves to God's standard
- The couple should discuss their individual expectations
- The couple should determine if they are "evenly yoked;" this includes being evenly yoked emotionally, intellectually, socio-economically as well as spiritually.
It can not be overstated that anyone desiring success in their marriage must carefully consider each of the above points. If you or your loved-one are considering marriage, it is important that you schedule pre-marital counseling as earliest as possible in the engagement period.
We offer "Christian, Pre-Marital Counseling" to those who may not have access to counseling through their church or for those who may not belong to a church. If you or one of your loved-ones are in need of pre-marital counseling, please contact us to schedule your initial screening interview with our Pastor, Rev. Sanders. To submit your request online, just click here. We will respond to your request within 24 hours.
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